The Acts of Mikey 1:1

Darkness fell.
And while it was dark outside on 72nd street in Manhattan at the time Mikey walked it. This darkness was all encompassing.
Darkness fell upon the eyes of Mikey, The mind of Mikey, The heart of Mikey, The soul of Mikey.
and then rain began.
In New York City, rain has the unique property of being able to hit you from any angle. this is in due part to the many building of various heights and widths, much like the people of New York City.
This means that a rain drop that began falling at a 83 degree angle of descent(if straight down is 90 degrees) may, through the magic of geometry, hit you square in the eye.(0 degrees)
So it was for Mikey on This day. The very surroundings seemed to carry a velvety plush beckoning Mikey to give in to the comfortable misery of despair.
Mikey had just been told the news from his dearest at the time that he was to be traded in for three women. That his once heterosexual life mate had morphed into a homosexual acquaintance and as she worded it herself,"These things just happen."
Between his third and fourth bite of a swiss cheese burger Mikey had gone from engaged to enraged, adored to floored, from centered to bent.
The rain, made it perfect.
It seemed like a baptism. Mikey felt his lingering innocence that he was bigger and better than the whole world slip from him gracefully.
In time, this could be replaced with self-confident wisdom, but there first had to be despair.
And so Mikey did.
Mikey would first attempt to find comfort and solace with those whom he carried the highest respect, his circle of friends. Sadly, this event happened on March 31st, and as he sought out this friendly comfort the next day, on april fools day, he was not to be believed and found nothing but stifling laughter.
The despair became deeper, like an endless supply of Mcdonalds gift certificates that you use for your daily nutrition, knowing that you are slowy killing yourself, though the death may be smeared with special sauce and groovy small plastic toys still.
Despair is also carried with you throughout your days, like mosquito bites that you scratch a little too much. In time, they heal, but the scars are forever present. There will always be people asking, "what is that on your arm? a gunshot wound? Or did you just scratch a mosquito bite too much?"
This act of trading Mikey for the three lesbians would end the salad days of Mikey and begin the age of Wisdom.
One of the more relvant acts of Mikey, that is the focus of this passage, is the act that was the final healing of the heart of Mikey. The act that allowed him to be cleansed of this powerful despair.
While fully swimming in the warm, bottomless comfort of this despair that provided Mikey with no purpose but to warm his prevalent butt, Mikey built a business. From this business, many lessons were learned, but the most relevant of which was personal responsibility.
Like others in this day, Mikey could craft an argument to blame anything other than himself.
Such examples would include, but are not limited to, blaming a non-existent "brain Cyst" for having to suddenly leave the employment of a local Pizza Magnate.
This would soon change when Mikey found the favor of an older woman from the west.
This woman was not much older than Mikey, Only a few fortnights separated the two, but this woman did shower Mikey with endless adoration and treated Mikey like an awesome physical specimen for which Mikey cared little.
The woman demanded that Mikey come to her land in the west and preach to her and her throng, that her throng may too see what the woman described as ,"the genius of Mikey".
Mikey agreed, because as a side effect of his despair, he happily sailed where the winds would take him.
The situation was entertaining and furthered the age of wisdom with many smaller lessons as well as the great revelation of whom the perfect woman for Mikey was to be. (someone other than this aged chick)
But the lesson mentioned here arrived when a younger lad than Mikey took the eye of his adoring older miss.
This, in itself, was not a great misery but a blessing as Mikey was looking for another direction concurrent with the appearance of this individual. What was of immeadiate concern was that Mikey needed a place to live.
Mikey went out into the void and found a studio apartment in the land of El Cajon. This apartment was within the income of Mikey, but would not be available for two weeks.
Rather than despair, Mikey embraced learning at this most critical time.
Was it not Mikey whom had journeyed to this place, to the home of this jezebel?
Did she not have children whom wished sainthood for Mikey, regardless of his coming displacement?
Did she not have throngs whom also thought the highest of Mikey?
Yes. all these were true.
Thus, it became clear to Mikey he was responsible for the crush in living situation.
Mikey accepted this in whole, spoke highly to throngs and children of the jezebel regarding her decision to displace. Mikey found class in a situation where others would have armed themselves and started firing.
AND IN SO DOING.
The jezebel paid for two weeks for Mikey in a local swank motel, left the new lad who was to replace Mikey on several occasions to seek the length of the wonders of Mikey.
AND.
Bought him Slurpees on each and every day he was exiled to the motel prior to availability of the posh studio apartment in the land of El Cajon.
Clarity was Mikey's. Mikey expanded on this.
It was fated that His first fiance would switch teams midstream, and this was beyond his control. Even if there was a single act from Mikey that assisted in the switch, it was still fated and beyond his control.
Mikey had just been dumped by a woman and convinced her to pay for his lodgings and garnered the favor of all of her people.
Wisdom then came to Mikey. He was not as bad an individual as he would like to believe.
Mikey walked outside and once again saw the stars. Hope was Mikey's once again.